Wednesday, April 30, 2008

I Guess the Artist Didn't Get the Memo

I was reading Warren Ellis' Crecy, which tells the story of the famed triumph of the English longbow over the chivalry of France in 1346. Early in the comic, Ellis tells us via his narrator, "We shoot or loose an arrow. We do not fire it. Firing is for cannon. Not cannons. Cannon is the plural of cannon."

Later on there is a map of the battlefield that shows how the troops were deployed. The artillery is shown in two spots with the following label: cannons. Whoops. The map of Great Britain is pretty funny though. To the north there is "Fucking Scotland," while to the west Wales is labeled simply "Sheep Shaggers." Did I mention this comic is very English?

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Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Deadwood Had It Right

I remember when Deadwood debuted, I found the profanity really over the top. It did lead to the absolute genius of the Mr. Wu/Al Swearengen conversion that consisted almost entirely of cocksucker (surely one of the greatest moments of TV ever) but I wondered about the historical accuracy of the swearing. Well, check this link out:

http://s210975194.onlinehome.us/blog/?p=41

This is a document warning baseball players in 1898 to watch the salty talk. The amazing part of it is that it lists examples of the sort of talk that will not be tolerated. These include such gems as, "A dog must have fucked your mother when she made you!" And to David Milch's delight, "You cock-sucker!" Thanks, history.

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Friday, July 06, 2007

Civil Wars

Yesterday afternoon I was watching this documentary series on the History Channel about the American Revolution (if you missed it, I'm sure they'll show it again next July 4th). One episode was about Britain's southern strategy and how it all went wrong. The British, you see, had stepped into a hornet's nest in the Carolinas. Loyalist and Patriot militias were terrorizing the countryside. The British made matters worse by issuing an "if you aren't with us, you're against us" decree. They looked at the situation as putting down a revolt. What was really going on, however, was what could be considered the first American civil war.

On paper it seemed simple enough. The British had the support of the Loyalist militias, while the small Continental army had the support of the Patriot militias. The war, however, was much more complicated on the ground. The various militias used the war as an excuse to settle old scores, seize disputed land, and persecute vendettas. Attacks led to retribution, which led to counter-attacks and so on. In hundreds of small battles American fought American with nary a redcoat a sight. It was a vicious circle of sectarian violence and the British army walked into the middle of it. They didn't know the lay of the land or the local politics. Their only real chance was to corner and destroy the Continental army and hope the countryside would fall in line. When this failed, their southern strategy was in shambles.

I'm sure the astute among you can see the parallels with the quagmire in Iraq. The biggest difference is that the British at least had a rebel army it could attack in open battle. The American army in Iraq doesn't even have that as a target. Nor does it really have the support of a group like the Loyalists. The army is simply stuck in the midst of a civil war, with no clear goals and no realistic strategy. Such are the perils of imperialist ambitions.

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