A new Oklahoma law requires women to get sonograms before they can have abortions. Depending on the state of the pregnancy, the sonogram may be transvaginal. The doctor must turn the screen to the patient and describe the fetus: fingers, toes, heartbeat, etc. None of this is optional, even for victims of rape or incest. Proponents of the law say it is so patients are fully informed before going ahead with the procedure. An interesting position, since they just passed another law that makes it legal for doctors to lie to women about the health of fetus. A doctor can fail to mention a birth defect, for example, and cannot be sued for deceiving the patient.
Funny, isn’t it, that the very same people screaming about tyranny from the Obama administration are fully behind mandating invasive medical procedures for others? I thought these stalwart conservatives were all about individual freedom and government staying out of their lives?
I therefore have a modest proposal for Oklahoma. I think their government should pass a new law to provide parity in their fine state. Once enacted, any man in Oklahoma who wants to buy a gun must first get a prostate exam. Furthermore, the doctor must turn a monitor towards the patient so he can watch a live feed of the whole procedure. Critics will say that I’m advocating controlling men’s bodies but I assure that’s not the case. I just think that before a man gets a deadly weapon, he should understand something about mortality. And what does a better job of that than having an old doctor stick his shaky finger up your ass for a few minutes?
So please, Oklahoma, consider this proposal. If women must endure an invasive medical procedure to do something that is fully legal in America, it’s only fair that men do the same.